The past day has been one of the hardest things I have ever dealt with in my life. Scratch that, it has been the hardest thing ever for me. As of a couple weeks ago, Leslie was starting to feel nervous about getting married and she was not sure she wanted to go through with our wedding the way she had been feeling. I pleaded with her and begged her to stick it out, all while giving her advice, praying for her, and asking her to speak with as many people as possible to help her through this nervousness. But after much effort on both our parts and not much result, we both agreed that the best thing for us to do would be to call off the wedding. We both want to be happy with who we are marrying and right now, with these feelings, she would not be happy to walk to the altar in the temple with me.
As you can imagine, I am a wreck and I am having a hard time with this. I love Leslie more than anything and I was totally ready to spend my life with her, but I cannot force her to feel a certain way and I can't make these feelings go away. I know you all care a lot about Leslie and me and that's why I wanted to let you know here. I appreciate your prayers and thoughts.